It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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