Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
