Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
