somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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