My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Even my vagina gasped.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
