Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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