the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
