how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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