My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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