I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
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