we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
