so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
