he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Randomize
