you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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