You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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