I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Can you repeat that, but with context?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
