Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
