I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
