if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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