your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
