Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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