Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Randomize
