i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Randomize
