And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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