i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
