I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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