id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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