he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
