im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
