Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
There's always time for handjobs
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
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