theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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