She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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