After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
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