I wish I could punch you in the face.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
im on a boat
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