I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
You ruined the universe
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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