Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
you never un-have a 4some
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
