his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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