The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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