Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
