that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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