there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I think people are normalizing furries
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
