why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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