Non-Jews are for practice
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize