i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Randomize
