the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Randomize
