Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize