you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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