im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
