i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
