He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize