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His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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