so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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